Cost. vs. Benefit Analysis

This journal was created with the idea of detailing my account of the journey across the country but I feel it would be negligent to not indicate some of the hardships of undertaking such a quest or the unexpected rewards from the beginning.

The first hardship, I would have to say, is my family. After that initial conversation there have been no others. I saw them briefly once and I will see them briefly once again simply to store the items that I don't need. It's as though I have already gone in spirit and they are simply waiting for the flesh to follow course... perhaps they're right. However, I cannot ignore the feeling of sadness that comes over me though at the thought of how long I will be gone and how much longer after I arrive that I may not see them.

The second hardship is packing. It's different from just moving because in this instance everything I would rather not have is already packed away. I probably wouldn't care if I didn't see it for years. Now I'm starting to pack away the things I will really miss, my books, my movies, my music. All the things that I won't get to see or feel for months. Sadly I believe my guitar is making it onto this list. It was a naive hope that I would be able to take it with me. Perhaps it speaks to the nature of my familial relations that out of everything my guitar is the one thing I will miss the most.

The first reward is kindness. Our landlord, a wonderful man even before this occured, has gifted us with some very useful items. A handcrank powered flashlight and a hydration pack. He kept looking for more things he could give us to make our journey just a little easier, but sadly we are reaching our weight limit. That gesture alone has given me some hope for the people I might meet on my travels.

The second reward is feeling prepared. There is nothing that compares to the idea of any possible hardship you can conceive being met with the knowledge that you have prepared and equipped yourself to the best of your means. Creating a first aid kit was one of those moments where I thought to myself, "Self, you are ready."

The third reward is recognition. As the itinerary gets finalized, more gets added to the journey. Stops along the way, campgrounds, water, etc. I recognize just how hard this is going to be now. I recognize how much danger there is in doing something like this. I also recognize that once again I am doing that which people say I can not and should not. I recognize that the impossible drives me to succeed.

World, I am ready, I shall meet you in six days time.